About Mary
Mary’s story begins as it ends, with her obituary
It is a story that does not have an outcome of survival, but it is a story of how she survived an arduous journey nevertheless. From diagnosis to death, Mary lived her life as richly as she did before her cancer, with great courage, humour and hope.
In the book that she self published, Rosie, Mary’s partner, tells the story of Mary’s five year encounter to help others who are embarking on a similar journey. This is a very female account of living and dying with illness, and is indicative of the very special way that women handle the hard times and support each other so wholeheartedly.
The book and this website are designed to offer hope and inspiration to patient & carer as they travel the insidious radiotherapy & chemotherapy route. This website features extracts from the book as well as allowing visitors to post their own stories and questions to the site.
As Rosie says in part of her dedication in the book. “Sometimes we are blessed in our lives to meet someone who is truly inspirational. Mary was one of those people. Full of love for her fellow man, engaging, with the greatest winning smile.
These attributes, along with many others, gave her enormous strength as she began her journey to embrace this arduous journey called cancer.
Her humour and tenacity outweighed the daily grind by her determination to live each day to the max. She made every post a winner as she travelled her life’s journey.
When Mary died, I had thought on many occasions, how important it would be to convey to others some of the simple, yet very precious things, that evolved from the roads that we had travelled during her illness. And how telling her story might help people understand their own trepidations as they embarked on a similar path.
Perhaps Mary, in the smallest way, could touch their thoughts and fears and offer courage at a perceived time of despair.”
As some of us know, terminal illness demands a great deal of those who are undergoing it. It requires courage to face very tough courses of treatment, to encounter the bad news as well as the good and to keep rallying your strength.
Mary Clarke, although a woman of many parts, would not want to be regarded as anything else but an ordinary person who loved life and elected to face her illness in her own extraordinary way.
She was a celebrant of life and had no intention of changing that because she became ill. Her five year journey is set out in the book, the entire book is available for you to download, and acknowledges her highs and lows and will act as a permanent record of a hard road well travelled.
It was not a road she expected or welcomed but she did choose the way that she charted the course.
Mary was, of course, the inspiration for this story, but the other source of inspiration was the revisiting of the email correspondence that Mary had with her friend Rae in Canada. Every day for an entire month, Mary and Rae wrote to each other via their laptops.
Through these emails, Mary’s eternal hope and humour shone through as she embarked on a 28 day radiotherapy regime.
They also illustrate the need for firm friends, understanding and love during such a confronting time.
- a story of inspiration and hope
This website is dedicated to the memory of Mary Louise Clarke 1949 – 2004 and her beautiful philosophy of life.
“I too tend to get carried away by the meaning of life and where cancers and treatments fit into the scheme of things.
But when it all boils down, we’re just here for a short while and really should enjoy our chance to live our lives to the full, try to find our honest selves and happiness and thereby help others to do the same.
Maybe I’m naïve, but trying to stay fixed on the positive joys of life has certainly helped me to get on with it day by day … and maybe be blessed with more joys than I ever dreamed of.”
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- story of inspiration and hope
Mary's journey
The cover image has been generously donated by Joyce van Dijk, photographer
Download here
